Michelle Jacoby, 49, started DC Matchmaking in Washington six years ago, when she was single. She lives with her husband in Bethesda.
Why do people need a matchmaker? Why can’t they just go online?
Some people, especially in D.C., don’t want their picture out on the Internet. Some people don’t want to invest the time. Some people have been doing it poorly and are aggravated. And some people get extremely frustrated and actually very upset about what they experience online.
How much do you charge?
Well, it’s a range. But I always just say it’s thousands, not hundreds.
Are your clients pretty much looking for a marriage partner?
Yeah, I only work with people who are looking for an exclusive, long-term relationship. In general, I like to say they’re looking for high self-esteem, emotionally healthy, relationship- ready, a big heart and emotionally stable — I mean, financially stable.
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Emotionally stable helps, too.
Yeah, both of those are important.
What’s the most common dating complaint you hear in D.C.?
Men saying that women in D.C. are unapproachable and women saying it’s too hard to meet men. My best advice to women who want to be approached is for them to understand that men are kind of nervous. It takes a lot of courage to walk up to a stranger. The advice to men is that they should know that one of the hottest things to women is confidence. Sometimes you just have to fake it until you make it. Just walk up to a woman and say, “I noticed you from across the room and I just wanted to say hi.”
Share this articleShareWhat are the top dating mistakes men make?
A lot of men like to tell their story. During the date they'll talk about their dating history. Their ex-wife. Their ex-girlfriend. Their dysfunctional family. They overshare things that really shouldn't be shared until later. And making negative comments about an ex-wife or -girlfriend doesn't make them look bad — it makes you look bad.
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And for women?
We look for what’s wrong too quickly instead of trying to be really curious about what’s cool and what’s good and what’s beautiful inside the other person. In D.C., especially, a lot of women show up really in their masculine energy. They think it’s okay to wear a business suit and go right after work to a date. And I really think it’s important to shed your work persona and that energy. Go put on a little cute dress that makes you feel like a woman.
Are there people who are just hopeless?
Some of the women I’ve worked with as a coach, the ones who I was the most nervous about and the most unsure about whether I could help them, have been the most successful. There’s someone for everybody if you put your best foot forward and look as good as you can look and you’re extremely positive, fun and uniquely yourself.
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